11. The Love Diet

“When a woman becomes her own best friend, life is easier.” ~ Diane Von Furstenberg.

How true is that? How vital is it these days to be okay with you?

This quote really resonated with me because it relates to this idea of putting yourself on the “Love Diet.”

Being on this “diet” asks you to evaluate how you are thinking, eating, feeling, and drinking.

So how did all of this start for me?

Not too long ago, I woke up and I was just filled with a lot of anxiety and I was like, “where is this coming from?”  As soon as I asked the question I knew the answer. 

I realized I hadn’t been doing all the things that I knew I could be doing to love myself more and in essence feel the feelings I desired. My self talk, how I was moving my body, and the food choices I was making were not at the standards I knew were good for me.

It was starting to take its toll by showing up in the form of fatigue in my body. What washed over me was this idea of going on a radical diet with the focal point being love. So I got out of bed and went out to the den where my niece was studying and said to her, “guess what? I’ve decided that starting today, I am going on the love diet.” She looked up from her studies, slightly giggled, and was like, “ummm…okay, that’s great.”  🙂 

I have to share that I’m kind of liking the results.

So what exactly is the love diet?

It’s tapping into what you know is right for you. It’s a balance between relishing life and discipline. It’s simply asking yourself with any choice you are about to make “if I loved myself in this moment, what would I choose?”

Are we willing to do what it takes to achieve the life we claim to want?

More importantly, are we courageous enough to love ourselves, mistakes and all, while doing so?

Nothing in my life has ever come to fruition with pushing, pulling and or being hard on myself. Never. It might have showed up for a few weeks, a month, or maybe even a year but drifted away because the foundation it was built upon wasn’t real. 

In fact, whenever I’ve forced myself into submission I tend to backslide.

Coming at things instead from a place of love, moderation, relishing more, laughing more, and living more is so much more enjoyable. If you are emotionally struggling with how you are feeing these days, this blog is for you. 

I’m having fun with this concept and I’d like to share the six ingredients of the Love Diet that have worked for me…

1. Set The Stage

If you could design the set in the movie of your life, what would it look like?  I LOVE the feel and vibe of Dian Keaton’s character’s home in the movie, Something’s Gotta Give. Does that mean I have to live in the Hampton’s and live in a huge home like she does to evoke the feelings I feel when I watch that movie? NO! 
If your scenes involve Paris do you have to move there to achieve the effect? Not at all!

You can set the stage of your life every day and have fun with. 

When you wake up are you looking at clutter? What about your bathroom? Your kitchen? How is your desk organized right now?

I treated myself and my niece to a bouquet of pretty flowers a few days ago and we split up the bouquet so we both have littles vases of pink roses at our desks. It just brings me joy walking by them. The other day we were working together in the living room and I looked around and realized the set we had created for the day was a sensory experience. 

We had classical piano music playing, lavender oil in the diffuser, and a fire flickering while we worked and sipped on rose tea and coffee.  It was just really beautiful and we were very productive work wise as well!

This week pay attention to the little things you can do to set the stage in a way that enhances your work and living experience. Look around your space and get inspired!

2. Get Up. Dress Up. Show Up 

I use this phrase from my dear friend Barbara who is just such a role model in terms of embracing life and showing up and bringing your best self. She epitomizes this phrase and lives it every day.

• Is how you are starting your day fueling or draining you?
• Do you grab the same old outfit or leggings or take a few minutes to decorate your body in a loving way? 
• Do you throw a scrunchie in your hair or take some time with it?

It’s tough not always having anywhere to go these days and yet what a loving act just for the sake of it to cherish and pay attention to how you lovingly treat your body.

Simply put, when you feel better, you do better.

3. Have some fun!
 

My friend, Kristen sent me a video the other day of her and her two young daughters sledding.  It was pure joy. She told me originally it was a no go for her to hop on the sled with them but rather than sitting on the sidelines she decided to join in on the fun and was so glad she did.

There is such magic in saying yes to the things we think we are too old for. 

My friend Lisa has an annual pass to Six Flags Great America amusement park… other people I know love to color…what did you love to do as a kid and why are you not doing it!? 🙂

Chances are the child within you is to screaming to get out and have some fun so go splash in a puddle, ride your bike, or build a snowman. In doing so, maybe all the fun you are having will outshine and diminish all the habits you are wanting to move away from.

4. Gratitude.

So often we have our gratitude lists and we go through all the people and things we’re grateful for…. but are you on that list? Do you give thanks for your gifts, strengths, courage, and kindness?

Instead we find it easier to rip ourselves to shreds. The cruelty and abuse we inflict on ourselves is mind boggling. 

The Love Diet is radically shifting our mindsets to how amazing we are and showing appreciation for that. If you need an extra boost of inspiration around this, check out “mirror work” by Louise Hay. You might feel silly doing it at first and I can tell you from personal experience it is literally life changing.

5. The Grace Pause

When you get triggered by yourself or someone else simply pause and breathe.

I have a quick story to share…

My niece and I were about to have dinner and watch the Queen’s Gambit. She had made corn bread and soup and as we sat down and I said “roll it” which is our queue to begin the show… the whole plate literally rolled off my plate and on to the beautiful new sweater my parents had just bought me. 

I immediately went to “how could I be so stupid?!” I was border line flipping out as my niece sat there with wide eyes asking “is there anything I can do?”

Ready to freak out, I reminded myself I was on the Love Diet and decide to take a pause of grace. I was able to say to myself, “it’s not going to matter five minutes from now” (which by the way, it didn’t) and I was able to get through it.

In that moment my reaction was going to dictate my reality for that evening. Thank goodness I chose to breathe, clean things up, and choose to let it go and enjoy the evening. 

We have the power to step into grace and to ask for grace in the moments when we want to lose it….and what could be more loving than that?

6. Acceptance of “what is.”

Life happens… and not always in the way we want it to. And that is okay.

Perfectionism is boring and blocks real learning and growth. Rather than pushing down the unwanted feelings, why not investigate them with curiosity, tenderness, and patience?

Acceptance of “what is”  isn’t rolling over and giving up. It’s acknowledging the situation and your feelings around it, learning from it, showing forgiveness, and then moving on to a better feeling thought.

So there you go! I feel like all of these ingredients of the Love Diet are really beautiful ways of staying present to life in the moment. 

When you wake up tomorrow, ask yourself….

• How do I want to feel today?
• How am I going to love and decorate my body today?
• How am I going to love my body enough to eat the food I know will nourish me.

Quit saving the good outfits, dishes, perfume, food, linens, or candles for “some day.” That “some day” is here and you are deserving of it right now simply for being you.

YOU are enough.

So relish in life.

Shower yourself with the simple pleasures and the delights of life.

Set up a beautiful living space.

Speak to yourself as if you were the love of your life.

And always ask, “what would love choose?”

Sending Lots of Love and Light,