Hello Darling,
Greetings to you from a gloriously rainy day here in Northern Wisconsin. A very inquisitive young lady about the age of 5 today asked me “why oh why do you like rainy days?”
My response was,”first off, I don’t like to sweat and humidity is not my friend…but most of all I love the coziness of settling in with a fire, music, candles, and a good book.”
Wherever you are and whatever the weather might be like in the neck of your woods, I do hope you are finding ways to relish in the moments of the day. Simple pleasures allow us to slow down, look around, and find that the things we truly need are within reach.
Oftentimes beneath the “wants” of life are actually the deep desire to feel a certain way. Now, more than ever, it seems connection and community are what many of us really desire. Traveling, going out for dinner, heading to farmers markets or festivals, joining a book club or deciding to join a gym.
On the surface, the intentions of these activities might be things like the taste of great food, learning about other ways of life, or getting in shape. Yet beneath oftentimes lies a need to connect with our fellow human beings.
Right before the onset of Covid and the subsequent lockdown, a friend said, “there just feels like there’s this sense of isolation and people are really seeking community.” Little did she or any of us know that an extreme form of isolation was literally just around the corner.
But here’s a question…
Could the physical isolation we experienced actually have brought to light the woundedness of our disconnection and allowed us the space to begin the healing process?
Over the past several months in my own beautifully eccentric (and at times exhausting!) community, I and several others have experienced an invitation into connection. It’s been a tumultuous year with changes and all the drama that inevitably comes with that. What I have realized through these times is that if you want to change the culture in which you live, you must first change your mindset around the drama and then your behavior. It’s amazing how a kind word or gesture can instantly heal what was once a tornado of emotions.
We all want community, yet sometimes the road to it is a rough one. Friendships, relationships… they all become more complete when the cracks that erupt are given the time and attention to heal. As my dear friend said recently “we must as a community fortify one another.”
If you want community, you must be brave enough to go out on a limb, say the hello, start the conversation, and become invested in supporting someone else’s owning healing journey. It’s so easy to say “they aren’t my problem” … yet if we continually choose to turn our backs on what isn’t easy, fun, and attractive, soon we may find ourselves in a lonely little nest of our own.
I simply adore the author Louise Penney. The murder mysteries are wonderful and yet it’s really the community she created in the fictional village of “Three Pines.” It’s a place where everyone belongs. No cookie cutter shape of a life required. All ages, all backgrounds… all friends. Through the good times and the bad.
For so often I desperately was searching for my own Three Pines. The beautiful surroundings, nature, yummy food, cast of characters, and an overall essence of coziness.
Who would have guessed that the chaos that was pushing me to leave this community has in a way been my greatest teacher… and doorway into realizing I am living in my own version of Three Pines after all!
When I made the conscious effort to shift my mindset from “this is too much I want to move” to “wow… this is teaching me so much about my own triggers and allowing me to grow” everything changed. I began to view my neighbors who I didn’t always agree with as colleagues on this at times crazy ride of a life.
What fun is life if you only engage with others who think the same way, act the same way, and live the same way? Boo hoo and BORING for sure!
I invite all of us to look today at our fellow humans through new eyes of compassion. To realize that while we may not agree with another person’s choices we do not know their history, their pain, or what crosses they may carry…and that the ones who drive us nuts perhaps could be the ones who are actually allowing our own healing and growth.
Sending you love today. I’m off for some tea and a snack while enjoying the rain.
Until next time….
EE
p.s. Check Meg’s FREE weekly workshops out here.
