Do you feel sometimes the familiar habits you default to are holding you back from feeling your best? Do you crave wellness but at times deep down question if you are worthy of experiencing it?
For so long the feelings of wellness eluded me. I loved reading the personal development books and listening to the podcasts, but for some reason, I couldn’t kick the habits I knew were holding me back.
What I know for sure is it takes courage to live with eyes wide open and intentionally create a conscious life through the choices you make.
In today’s episode, I share 5 steps to wellbeing that have helped me get inspired to move towards wellness. Whether it’s food, alcohol, or ways of thinking that are holding you back from feeling the way you want to feel, you truly do have the power to get inspired about your life.
Highlights of today's episode:
The one thing to ask yourself each morning that will anchor you to wellness.
How a “divine circle” can inch you towards your goals much faster than going it alone.
An essential ingredient of starting to live consciously.
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Transcript: 5 Steps to WEllbeing
Hey everyone! Today’s topic inspired by the workshop I did this week with my 30 Day Reset community, “Why we hold on to familiar habits when we really crave wellness.”
I have a question for you…
“Do you feel worthy of wellness?”
I know it seems like an odd question. Looking back in my life, I realize the reason I was trapped in the habits that held me back, whether it be what I was eating or drinking or who I was hanging around with, because at a deep level, I didn’t feel worthy of caring for myself of loving myself. Can you can relate?
Because when you think about it, our lives are a series of habits. Our days are a series of habits from the moment we wake up until the moment we go back to sleep and in these hours we have the opportunity to either live a habit filled life or a life immersed in rituals that hold meaning.
You might be the opposite. One of those rare species who seems to embody wellness with ease. My nieces are perfect examples. They work out, they have their routines in the morning, they go to bed at a good time, they read every day for pleasure, they knit, they take baths, they eat well. They’re just such role models for me in terms of embracing wellness. and I so wish that I had had their mode of thinking when I was their age!
I guess you could call me a seeker of wellness.
A funny story to share. My other niece is in the midst of moving in. One moved out… the other moves in! Anyway, I said to her, “Hey let’s turn this den into the look and feel of a library. So I ordered these cute little antique brass title holders from Etsy similar to the old fashioned ones in libraries to highlight the different categories. So as we were going through the books and organizing them into the appropriate areas, we were laughing so hard because every other book she’d hand to me with a smirk and say “personal development!”
I just had to laugh because I feel like my entire life has been this journey to wellness. And I have been guilty of, you know, how, when you love to set goals and like the fun part is the planning and mapping them out and getting the new planner. And the tough part is executing and taking action on them.
Well, that’s how it was for me with wellness. I would read all the books. I listened to the podcasts. I’d have all the greatest intentions. I create the vision boards, but when push came to shove, I fell short. I’d wake up in the morning and be like, all right, I’m going to do X, Y, Z today. And I’m going to feel amazing. And then life would just show up, I’d get overwhelmed. And that it was just so easy to default, to old familiar habits.
And I don’t know if you can relate – if you can let me know. So, you know, with this whole idea of moving away from alcohol, so alcohol was one of these habits that I knew at a deep level was holding me back.
And so a year ago, as many of you know, I decided to take an extended reset with a friend of mine, actually two friends of mine from alcohol, and it literally changed my life. And how did I do it?
I’m going to share five steps that really helped me get into the mind space, to where I could, you know, I had, I had the backbone to do this. I had the energy to do this, and I had the inspiration to do this because making any kind of change is really, really difficult and I’m not going to lie.
You know, it wasn’t easy at first, but once I got into the swing of it, the pendulum swung so far where I was feeling so good.
I like to say that my 30 day reset, it’s not a reset to give up alcohol. It’s a reset to dive into joy. And when you figure out, like, what makes you feel so good? There’s no going back there really isn’t, it’s like opening up a gift and unwrapping it and, you know, taking off the ribbon, once you like rip open the paper and you see this beautiful gift that’s available to you, you can’t stuff it back in the box.
And that’s how I feel with this journey to wellness. So, so when, you know, when you’re inspired to change something in your life, whether it be, you know, the people you’re hanging out with or how you’re spending your free time or what you’re eating or what you’re drinking, I feel like these four steps, they at least worked for me. And that’s why I’ll share them with you.
Okay. So number one was awareness. So I was working with a coach a couple of years ago, and I was telling her, I’m like, you know, I’m not an alcoholic, but I just, I feel like I just have the steady drip of wine each night. It’s like a glass or two, and it’s just, it’s stealing my energy. It’s stealing my joy.
And she said to me, listen, don’t change anything you’re doing. What I want you to do is just continue with your regular habit, but I want you to pay attention to the intention behind it. I want to pay attention. I want you to pay attention to why you’re having the glass of wine. I was like, okay. So it was the sense.
So number one is really awareness. And how often are we on, you know, autopilot where we’re not living consciously and intentionally with our life?
We just do the things we do because, well, you know, I always have a beer at night and sit on the couch and watch Netflix.
Or I always go out for brunch with the girls and have a cup of bloody Mary’s or mimosas, or, you know, I always, you know, have McDonald’s Saturday or whatever it may be, you know, but it’s just the awareness like, well, why, you know, it’s starting to it’s that awareness and kind of questioning what, what is the intention behind my choice?
Because when we live with intentionality, then we start to consciously create our lives. So we may say, Oh, I want to feel better in my body. Or I want to release weight, or I want to move away from alcohol. We may want that, but are we willing to go the distance to really get intentional about our life and to then start consciously creating our life?
That’s where the rubber meets the road. That’s where, you know, you make your goals, but then it’s the execution part it’s taking action and that’s not always fun.
2wo is, take baby steps. You don’t have to dive all in. Now, maybe that, maybe that works for you.
I follow a woman on social media and I actually have her app it’s called Deliciously Ella. And I love it because, you know, I’m, plant-based, um, I dunno, what do they call it these days? Vegetarian plant-based anyway, she, um, made a radical change in her life, literally overnight. She was really sick while she was in college and she just decided to go plant-based and then, you know, she tells her story about, you know, everything that changed in her life because of that.
But for a lot of people, the baby steps are much easier, you know, just stepping into new ways of doing things.
So if you want to move away from alcohol, maybe one night, a week, instead of drinking, you go to a yoga class, um, or you go to a movie or you plan a walk with neighbors or friends.
So just taking baby steps. When I did this, I, um, when I was moving and, you know, we’re all on a journey constantly. It’s not like I’ve arrived at wellness, you know, on my journey to ongoing wellness.
I started doing things like, you know, taking classes and Reiki, energy work, um, going out and buying a juicer and falling in love with juicing. I know that sounds kind of funny, but I love juicing.
Um, you know, trying out kind of out of the norm, things that I never would have thought about doing 10 years ago, like going to a sound healing class or a gong bath. Now, if you’re wondering what a gong bath is, check it out.
It’s really fun and you can Google it, but it’s just another form of sound healing. Um, I started playing around with different ways of making tofu, you know, just baby steps. You are right now where you are, is exactly where you are supposed to be and where you are now could be vastly different from where you are a month from now a year from now a week from now, but just take steps that feel right to you.
3. How do you want to feel?
Number three is, you know, just starting the day by asking your question, how do I want to feel today? And that’s what really started to move me away from alcohol, because I would wake up and I’d say, I want to feel well. I want to feel peaceful today. And I started realizing that, you know, getting buzzed up at night and going to sleep kind of a little tooted up in, you know, wasn’t making me feel peaceful the next day.
It wasn’t making me feel well. So it’s, you know, asking yourself the question, how do I want to feel? And then having the wherewithal and the courage to make the choices during the day that align with the answer to that question of how you want to feel. So if I want to feel happy, you know, what are some ways that I can do that? And I want to feel happy. I’m probably not going to hang out with people that always drain me. If I want to feel happy, I’m probably not going to eat the foods or drink the beverages that I know make me, you know, impatient the next day or grumpy the next day. Okay. Number four, show yourself some respect. So this one is a big one. I’m reading a book right now called the love diet. And that’s what they talk about.
You know, treating yourself with dignity, treating yourself with respect, treating yourself with love and how I like to describe this. As you are mothering yourself, you are being a mother to yourself, you are nurturing yourself. You are, you know, treating your body like a God or a goddess. It’s, you know, treating your body like a temple. And I know that sounds cliche, but it’s true. It’s being mature enough to step into the role of mothering yourself each day, with the choices that you make. So, you know, how do you want to feel today? How do you want to feel tomorrow? Um, in, in that goes back to number three, obviously, but you know, when we treat ourselves with dignity and respect and love, a lot of times the path to feeling the way that we want to feel is so much easier. Okay. The final one is create your divine circle.
And what I mean by that is identify people in your life who you feel are aligned with your values, who you feel are in alignment with how you want to feel and the goals that you want to reach. When I started on my own journey of stepping away from alcohol, I decided to just take a break from going out with the friends of mine that loved to go out for dinner and then out to the bars and listened to the bands and nothing’s wrong with that. They’re awesome. And they have so much fun. It was just that for me was draining me. And so I decided to step away from that. And I decided to cultivate new people in my divine circle of people who like to go to brunch, you know, after a long walk and not drink mimosas people who like to go to sound healing sessions, people who like to go on walks, you know, during happy hour.
And, you know, it’s just cultivating more of that. And if you don’t have people in your life like that, listen to some podcasts, get some books, you know, um, you know, someone that you admire, maybe an author, you know, maybe they have some programs or courses that you can take and you can treat yourself during the days when you normally do those old hold you down habits or hanging out with the people that are, you know, just choosing leisure activities that are just kind of, not your thing anymore. You know, become a student of wellness, become a student of personal development. And, and you’ll find that through that you’ll naturally attract people, actual friends into your life. So at the end of the day, we’re all worthy of wellness and wellness is your own personal definition. I always say, you are the guru of you.
So I ask you like, what is the next step in your life to feeling better? I know for myself, it’s now been over a year and I feel really good about my relationship with alcohol. Am I perfect all the time? No. Who is perfection is boring, but I feel so good. And I woke up yesterday and I thought, okay, I’m ready for the next thing. What else can I bring in? And so I am making a very concerted effort to really get excited and inspired about starting to eat the foods that I know are good for me, the vegetarian foods, because I’m not going to lie. I’ve had way too many beyond burgers, the veggie burgers and French fries. Yes, that’s vegetarian, but come on now. Um, and so I’m excited for that journey and I have all of the tools available to me. And I bet you have all the tools and books available to you because what we so often strive for, you know, we want to learn about, we read about, we listened to podcasts, et cetera, about, and so I guess the question this week that I want to ask you is in what area of your life have you been allowing yourself to feel well, what area of your life have you not, maybe felt worthy of wellness because I’m here to tell you that you are.
And I invite you to take that first step into wellness by becoming aware of the habits that you, um, participate in, you know, taking baby steps, surrounding yourself with your divine circle of friends, colleagues, loved ones, and really showing yourself the dignity and respect and love that a mother would for their child. And I think everything starts at love. So with that, I wish you a really good week. Thanks again for inviting me into your world. And Hey, if you’re interested in taking a break, hop over to Meg K daily.com and I’ll see you there. And, uh, please share this with friends. I love building this community. I’ve got a very exciting guest next week on the podcast in, I’m not going to tell you who it’s a surprise, but I think you’re going to love her.
Have a wonderful week and love to you,